Planning

So, this 'living with intent' thing, being purposeful, isn't just going to 'happen' without some thinking, some visualising and some planning. Yes, I've known this for quite some time, and yes, I am really just working this out now. I've been here, at very similar conclusions and with muchc the same intentions, at the beginning of the year for quite a few years. I plan, I make lists, I create folders that I think will somehow change my life, make it run smoother. What I fail to do is plan properly how to implement all these changes, and I love the saying 'failing to plan is planning to fail'. I also want everything to happen now, for the house to be fabulous by the end of the week and for all our routines to be, well, routine immediately.

It doesn't work like that. Yes, obvious, I know.

So, this time is different. This time I'm thinking, researching (i.e. reading blogs of those who seem to have a pretty good, sensible handle on all this stuff!), finding what will work for us, and letting it all sit and marinate. I've already started implementing some changes, being intentional in things I do, and ignoring (as much as I can) the little voices that say 'leave the dishes, go and watch tv/read/browse aimlessly online'.

The first thing I found that has *really* triggered the cogs turning in my brain and my heart is SimpleMom's blog, and an e-book she has written 'One Bite At A Time', subtitled '52 projects for making life simpler'. Now, I'm normally quite wary of any 'x steps to .......' books etc, but this one caught my attention, and for good reason. The author, Tsh Oxenreider, says on the site

'One Bite at a Time: 52 Projects for Making Life Simpler is a simple living handbook. I took my favorite ideas that I already wrote on Simple Mom, then rewrote and reorganized them into manageable chunks. Broken down into manageable chunks, One Bite at a Time provides you with steps, tips, links, and motivation to slow down and simplify.

Here’s the thing: I bet most of you know what to do to simplify. You’ve heard most of the little tips and tricks to slow down life and make tasks less frustrating. It’s just overwhelming to know how to start.

With this book, I’m giving you permission to focus on just one thing at a time, until you’ve got that task down—and then you can move on to the next one.

52 tasks. Practical. Do-able. Given to you in a one-at-a-time, take-a-breath format, for you to tackle at your own comfortable pace. You know what you should do, you just need a handbook. That is the gift this book is giving you.'

I love that - 'I bet most of you know what to do to simplify........It’s just overwhelming to know how to start'. Bingo!!!! That was *exactly* how I was feeling, and couldn't articulate! I would really encourage you to have a look at the sample of the book, and at $5.00 it's a small invesment to make for something that could be very helpful (disclaimer: I have absolutely no connection with Simple Mom, just love her work!!).

I've also found a few posts from the Simple Living sites and some others that have really resonated with me, and I've been mulling over these past couple of weeks as I feel the tendrils of change winding their way through my head and heart.

Simple Mom

The ONE difference between lon-lasting resolutions and spectacular failures

Goals make us available, not perfect

Two ways to make New Year's resolutions actually STICK

Questions to help you make some goals

Resolve NOT to

Simple Organic

My 2012 Green Goals

Happy Simple Living

So now I need to go and be intentional. I need to pluck the thoughts and concepts currently floating around in the soup of possibility in my brain, and start writing, to work out how I'm going to make this all work for us, in a way that will 'stick', and fit in with us and our life.

It's a good thing I like making lists :-)

With intent

Source: helpmegetthin.tumblr.com via Veronika on Pinterest

I've had this post marinating in my head for a week or so now, and I'm still not entirely sure how it will turn out!

I don't know why now, maybe it's been reflecting on the year past, and thinking about the year to come, but it's occurred to me recently that I'm not particularly intentional or purposeful, and I've realised that that's one of the reasons I'm not very good at achieving goals I set. I'm great at making plans, defining goals, and identifying what it is I want to do, but I'm often not very good at actually doing it. I've been reading a few blogs whose authors have written about their plans for the new year, and I started seeing a common thread that really struck a chord with me - living with intent.

That's when it hit me - that's not something I really do, in the big picture, grand scheme of thing. I don't live with intent. Many of the things that have happened in my life have happened because I've either just let them, or not done anything (or much) to stop them. This is not something I'm beating myself up over or anything, it more a realisation that being intentional is a real key in achieving goals, and heading in the direction I want to go.

Case in point - I'm not the world's best 'housekeeper', I do what I have to do because I have to do it, but it's always a chore, I procrastinate over getting jobs done (wasting more time and energy), and the house is more often a mess than it's not :-) And it's because I'm generally guided by how I feel about doing something, rather than being intentional about doing it. If I simply changed my thinking and behaviour to being intentional about what I do, rather than doing things when I feel like doing them, I'm pretty sure life would run a bit more smoothly!!!

But it's not just the 'practical' things like housework cooking etc etc, it's the 'self' side of things I'm generally not intentional and purposeful about, either. Ask the people who know me, and they'll tell you I'm good with the ideas and the plans, but I'm not very good at following through, and I usually end up stopping/dropping something along the way. I call it being inherently slack, and if I get bored with something or it gets too hard, I often stop whatever it is - perfect examples are exercise, journeys/'exercises' in my spiritual life, artistic pursuits etc.

It's dawning on me more and more that if I just make the choice to live with intent, life will be different. I'm not talking about huge changes, or life suddenly becoming easier or anything like that, but my gut feeling is that if I change my beaviour in small ways, then some things in life can
change in big ways. I make excuses that my life is busy, working full time as a single mum to 3 kids, dealing with pain every day blah, blah, blah, but at the end of theday, I can make the choice to say 'no, I'm not going to flake it on the couch/spend way too much time aimlessly browsing online/ zone out in front of the tv', but choose to spend 10 minutes - 1/2 an hour tidying up/cleaning out a shelf in a cupboard/planning a menu for the week/ getting up earlier/ cleaning out the car, and then those jobs are just done, creating more time for the things I want to do - knitting that jumper, writing that story, sewing that top - and often whinge I don't have time for. I had a crystal clear example fo this the other day - whilst I've been on holidays, I have set myself of doing a 'big, I've-been-putting-it-off' job each day, and these jobs have taken up surprisingly little time. The other night I finally tackled cleaning out under the kitchen sink, which I thought would take ages, a job I have been putting off for months. It took 19 minutes to do. 19 minutes. When I finished, I sat back and thought about all the time I'd wasted sorting through the cupboard looking at stuff, all the times I'd put the job off, and it took 19 minutes to rectify that.

I know this is not new, this is not rocket science, and if anyone's reading this, some of you will be thinking 'how did she not know that?', and all this is stuff I've always known, but I've not applied ot my life. So now is the time to change, to start living with intent, being purposeful, changing my behaviour, which will honestly make me a better role model for the kids too. It's not something I thought I'd be blogging about (I mean really, who wants to read this stuff??), but I've also realised that the times in life I have been successful at achieving goals are the time I've been held accountable - losing weight through Weight Watchers, getting my degree, saving for my house. So I'll hold myself accountable to whomever wants to join me on my journey, to continue blogging it all along the way - I know I'll need a record to keep track, and it will keep me intentional :-)

Where to now??

So, the verdict is in. No more running for me. My physio and podiatrist effectively said I'd be stupid to consider continuing to run (only they said it much mroe nicely), and the arthritis has affected my feet to the point where I limp and hobble around more so than walk normally. But, I can still walk, and I know this will pass eventually, so for now I'm trying to work out how to exercise without involving weight/pressure on my feet. Swimming is the obvious answer, and I'll be taking the plunge (pardon the pun!!) tomorrow.

As I've mentioned previously, the downturn in my health has made me really think about what I eat, wht I'm putting into my body and I'm aiming for as wholefoods and organic a diet and lifestyle as possible. I've switched to Dominant household cleaning products, and so far so good, the scents don't bother me, and the products last for aaaaages. I've also been buying organic food as often as possible, which is made much easier with the opening of an organic grocery store in our town recently.

This is an area where I have a constant internal tug-of-war. I firmly believe that organic food is what is best for us to eat, as it is free from the chemicals that have pervaded our food over many years. I also believe that the less chemicals I have in my life, be it what I eat or clean my home with, the better that is for dealing with a chronic auto-immune disease. The struggle comes in that the cost of organic food is higher than non-organic, and while I believe that this cost is very reasonable and should be paid, I have a tight budget when it comes to food, and I try to make it stretch as far as possible. I buy organic fruit and veg from my friend who owns the local store and delivery business, and flatly refuse to buy from the supermarket. I buy tinned and packaged organic produce as I can afford it, but I do often have to go with a non-organic option due to finances. I would rather be a 100% organic household, but until the cost of organic food drops (which I hope it will as the consumer demands more organic volume available in the marketplace), that won't happen, and I have to weigh up my priorities.

Part of working towards this goal (an organic and wholefood diet and lifestyle), I have resurrected my veggie garden this year. I don't have as much planted now as I had hoped to, but I do have a thriving garden, and I'm slowly working my way through 'deep cleaning' my backyward, and transforming it into a beautiful area that will supply as much of my food needs as it can. This season we have tomatoes (20+ plants and counting, about 7-8 varieties), lebanese cucumbers, mini capsicums, eggplant, potatoes, silverbeet, beetroot, carrots, corn, lettuce and I've finally established a herb garden. There's actually more planted than I thought there was!! I believe that I have plenty of space to provide us with varied, seasonal produce (and therein lies the key, eating food that's in season, but that's a post for another day), it will just take planning and effort on my part. Growing as much of our own food as we can will reduce the impact of our consumption on the environment, I'll know how it's grown, and what chemicals aren't used, and I only have to walk out my back door to get it, not get in the car and drive to the shops. To top it all off, I love pottering around outside, taking in what's growing around me, what's come from a tiny seed, and I never fail to delight in seeing those tiny green seedlings poking through the soil that become big, beautiful plants that produce food that we eat. I'm going to set myself a goal each year in the garden - this year it's to harvest enough tomatoes for me to preserve to last us for the year, so I don't have to buy tinned tomatoes. I'll be recording the progress here, so far it's all on track!

Lots going on in my head as to what I want to achieve this year, much of it involving things around the house. I had the carpet pulled up a couple of weeks ago, and I'll sand and paint the floorboards.

Before (looks like the 70's vomited all over the floor!!!)

After (even the bare floorboards are sooo much better!)

The boards are in great condition, they just need sanding and then I'll paint them an off-white colour. In keeping with my low chemical impact ideals, I've found a paint that is no VOC (Volatile Organic Compunds), ecolour is a range of water based, non-toxic paint :

'The ecolour technology is an Australian invention that turns recycled and re-refined waste engine oil into a water based paint. Australia collects and recycles over 300 million litres of waste oil annually, 80% of which is currently used as a dirty burner fuel producing high carbon emissions. The oil acts as a preservative and provides durability, superior coverage and smooth application qualities to the paint. ecolour is committed to making a real and positive change to the environment and our sustainable paint solutions are leading the way for a brighter future.'

So excited to have found a local supplier as well!! The carpet hasn't been the only thing to go - after a random converstaion with some visiting girlfriends the other day, the mantlepiece and built in corner bookcase in the loungeroom is gone too!!

Before

After

Next to go will be the tiles around the fireplace, just not sure yet what to replace them with (I'd like to move the fireplace and cut out half the wall, but that's another post entirely!!) It's all a start anyway, I have much to learn about DIY, but it's going to be a fun ride along the way :-)

Potential superhero????

One of the symptoms of my arthritis is a condition called dactylitis, also known as 'sausage digits', basically meaning swollen fingers and toes. I've got a couple of misshapen toes after a 'run' of dactylitis, and now the first finger (left index finger) has joined the party.

From Drop Box With all these bodily swellings going on, and after seeing a cartoon featuring the Hulk on ABC3 last night, I started to ponder - maybe there's a superhero inside me trying to get out, lol?!?!? It's just taking a *really* long time!!!! *Sigh*, I wish that were so, but my body's recent misbehaviours means a trip back to the GP on Friday, and more assessments. And it also means no running, for now anyway :-( This would be another reason why I am *so* grateful to have a Thermomix in my house, it's really reduced the amount of food prep I have to do, saving my poor hands at the moment. And it's still all Thermomixing, all the time around here!!! July 29th - almond cake (gluten free) July 30th - Jude Blereua's 'Echidnas' - Butter Chicken and rice (from 'Everyday Cooking') - chocolate custard July 31st - coffee (latte - cup of milk, scoop of ground coffee, 7 minutes at 70deg on speed 4) August 1st - coffee - rice for leftover Butter Chicken August 2nd - coffee - mashed potatoes (soooooo gooood!!!!) August 3rd - coffee

Seriously???

Sometimes, I think I just can't win, no matter what I do.

From Drop Box

Heels aren't supposed to look like that, only apparently my body has decided mine does. This is part and parcel of my arthritis, as I wrote about in my previous post. There's no rhyme or reason to what happens in the course of the disease, or when, and at the moment I'm in a flare, which has put paid to my running for however long it takes for things to settle. I can cope with a few swollen joints and keep running, but being in a flare is the physiological equivalent of feeling being hit by a truck, and given I'm hobbling more than walking at the moment, running would not be entirely sensible!!!

Frustrating as it is, I have to keep focusing on being otherwise healthy and active, because it's all too easy to fall into the cloud of pain and darkness that chronic pain can bring. It's National Pain Week this week, presented by Chronic Pain Australia. Pain is a often misunderstood fact of life, particularly chronic pain, and a topic I'm very interested in, both personally and professionally. The aim of National Pain Week is to 'create awareness and shine a spotlight on the dilemma of people living with pain, and work towards creating a hopeful message about living with pain', and Chronic Pain Australia 'are dedicated to reducing the social and other barriers to living with chronic pain'.

As part of learning to live with chronic pain, I am becoming more and more aware of the importance of what I eat, and am aiming to have a diet that consists mainly of whole foods and to greatly reduce the amount of junk I eat. Working full-time has certainly impacted on the quality of the meals I cook for the kids and I, I often joke that scrambled eggs on toast is a gourmet meal in our house!! So we have a new 'family member' to help :-) Meet Thermie!!!

Thermomix, the world's smallest, smartest kitchen.

The Thermomix is an amazing appliance that does nearly everything except bake, roast and fry. It mills, grinds, pulverises, grates, kneads, minces, chops, stirs, cooks, whips, beats, crushes, steams and so much more!! Since Thermie was delivered over a week ago, I have cooked more dishes more regularly than I have for months, and *everything* has been from scratch. The funny thing is, the time I've spent cooking has been greatly reduced, including the washing up :-) So far, I've cooked (and we've all loved!!):

20th July
- chocolate mousse
- coleslaw
- custard
- mayonnaise

21st July
- chicken and mushroom pasta
- foccaccia
- dukkah

22nd July
- wholemeal bread
- almond cake (gluten free)
- chocolate devil's food cupcakes

23rd July (my first demo!!)
- fruit sorbet
- bread
- hommus
- beetroot salad
- mushroom risotto
- custard

24th July
- porridge
- bread
- pumpkin soup

25th July
- porridge
- hommus
- bolognese sauce

26th July
- porridge
- veggie concentrate stock
- chicken cacciatore risotto

27th July
- foccaccia

28th July
- steamed couscous
- hot chocolate

All soooooo good!!! I love the Thermomix so much that I've decided to be come a consultant, and am really looking forward to demonstrating this fabulous 'pair of helping hands' in in people's kitchens :-) I'm loving finding new recipes to try, and have come across a plethora of Thermomix and healthy living blogs, I'll be sharing recipes and links as our Thermomixing adventure continues!!

The only problem now is making sure I don't put back on all the weight I've lost, especially while I'm not running!! If you've got some great links and recipes, please post them in the comments :-)

Well, that didn't exactly go as planned....

Four months between posts wasn't in the plan, but neither was a couple of month's hiatus from The Program due to getting sick again. 'Getting sick' for me is when my arthritis flares, as I'd posted back in March. My foot and my knee flared, making walking somewhat of an everyday challenge, let alone running. Once my knee settled after a couple of months, I got back running again. Then, I got gastro and was out of action for a couple of weeks. Following that, I dropped a piece of firewood on my left foot (just under my little toe), and it's still bruised three weeks or so later.



When it comes to running, my feet are my great asset and my biggest liability. My feet take me from A to B easily when I'm well, but when they don't 'work' properly, every step is painful and takes energy and effort. I'm used to pain now, and managing it has become a part of my daily life, but funnily enough, it's when I'm running that I don't notice it. Maybe it's the ultimate distraction therapy, be it at the gym on the treadmill or out on the road, for whatever reason, I'm too focused on something else to notice the pain that's always there. That in itself is a good reason to stick to The Program. However, when I've finished a run, I'm hobbled for while, but it's worth it for what I've achieved :-)

I'm 'in training' for the City to Bay 12K fun run in Adelaide on Sept 18th. For me, having a defined goal has really shifted my mindset in this whole running gig. I've got a training plan to follow, and each session I finish is another step closer to my goal, and another step along my path to becoming a runner. I've been reading Hot (Sweaty) Mamas and Mile Markers, and in one of those books I read that it takes the human body about 3 months to become 'exercise conditioned' (or something like that), meaning that after 3 months of regular exercise, this becomes the 'norm' for your body, and you start to miss it if you don't do it. I want to be like that. I want to *want* to run, to walk, to do resistance training.

I went on my awesome run today because of what I read in Hot (Sweaty) Mamas last night, about excuses. That chapter could have been written about me, and it was still in my head today as I was contemplating if I was going to run, and if so, where (outside or gym). It was about 10degC, windy, and raining, and I laced up and headed off. And it was glorious - I've never run in the rain, or into a headwind, and I couldn't believe I actually liked it. If I'd listened to myself, I would have missed out on that experience, and now I know I have no excuse not to run, as cold and wet as it can be. I ran (and walked, baby steps) for nearly 5K, the longest in ages, and even now, 9 hours later, it still feels good, even if I am still hobbling :-)

So The Program starts again. Week 3 of training, and this week I'll introduce some resistance training as well. But it's not just about 'starting a program' this time. As I've posted before, it's about a lifestyle change, about changing my mind set and habits, and fighting those excuses that come all-too-easily. Changes I plan to make 'stick', for the times, they are a-changing :-)

Awesomeness defined

I think I found my secret weapon today.

Let me back up. Long weekend here in SA, and I had plans that I was determined to at least partially achieve, including getting to the gym. By this afternoon, I thought the gym was a write off, and therefore achieving any fitness goals as well. The kids and I had worked away at the jobs in the house and yard, and I had knocked off more jobs than I had anticipated, so I was feeling pretty satisfied about that. For the first time in months, the backyard looks half decent - there are only a couple of patches left to weed and mulch (thanks to the stellar efforts of a dear friend's husband who donated some of his holiday time to my jungle this week!!), and anyone who knows my backyard knows what a huge achievement that is!!!! I cleaned the shed out, washed and hung out more loads of washing than I care to count, sorted out my bedroom, cleaned out the car, cooked meals and washed dishes over and over, refereed far too many disputes between kids, took them to the pool and had movie night with nachos and Forrest Gump, and even got in a bit of craft work. All in all, a great weekend.

However, my plans to end the weekend with a trip to the gym were sidelined by a very welcome visit from a friend, and I just resigned myself to missing a session, which wasn't really all that hard as missing a session meant talking knitting and books instead :-) I had told the kids that when we finished the last job in the back yard, we would take the dog for a walk. I knew if I told the kids that was my plan that they would hold me to it, and I was right. I had tried bargaining with myself to get out of it - again - but the kids were laced up and ready to go with the dog on the lead, so I had no choice.

We set off at a brisk pace, and then one of the kids asked if we could run. When the next kid agreed, how could I say no? So we ran. And ran. And ran.

I haven't run outdoors for nearly 4 years, and I've only been running on the treadmill again for about 6 weeks. I wasn't planning on trying out the pavement for a few more weeks yet, and certainly not until the elements all lined up. This afternoon was warm, we were running into the wind, there were hills, I wasn't hydrated, I hadn't warmed up, and now as I'm typing this, my back is protesting loudly. But it was perfect. I've never run with my kids before, and they made it so easy. I had to pull them back to my pace, lol, but it was just so easy. Whilst DS would have run full pelt the whole way, DD is like me and needed to pace herself, but I was surprised that I had to stop to wait for her to catch up, when I could have kept running. It was simply awesome, running with and for the kids, encouraging them and being so encouraged by them. It was like I had discovered a secret weapon that I didn't realise I had, and I knew that it was the first of many runs to come.

But then it got even better :-) We live on top of a hill, which means having to get up to the top of a hill to get home. I've never run up a hill in my life, even before I hurt my back. When we rounded the corner of our street, DS took off with the dog, and DD was walking behind me. I turned around and challenged her, to see if she could run more steps up the hill than I could. She took off, and I wasn't far behind. And before I knew it, I was at our driveway. I had run up the hill.

I ran up a hill.

I. Ran. Up. A. Hill.

This is huge for me. *Really* huge. I constantly underestimate myself when it comes to my physical abilities, and I constantly surprise myself when I achieve something I wasn't sure I could do. I didn't set out to do what I did today, and I did it anyway. And the best part? When DD asked me 'Mum, when can we do that again?' :-)

Life is like a box of chocolates - you really never do know what you're going to get :-)